well done SASMB..i look forward to presentation night. you'll astound the audience and convert your biggest critics (whoever they may be..)...i'm sure of that. (:
SPSMB...don't be disheartened. we live in a highly political world..and there are probably a lot more that went into the final decision..a lot more than music at least..which in my belief..is what matters on the stage. it's the music and the people. don't give up..
i fell aslp at 8-ish..woke up at 9..and am wide awake now. ):
i don't like to have occasional outbursts..or sudden losses of composure. i refuse to be affected by words..but sometimes it's hard. and when words do sting..don't fault me for doing weird things or saying stupid things. i'm tired of having to appear strong. i'm not that strong. i do need to break down and cry at times. i'm tired of the politics. i hate politics. i hate the way people play around with other people's minds/psyche/emotions. i hate judgemental people and the way their gazes put you to shame. some people make me feel like inflicting upon them the amt of agony they sometimes, unknowingly or not, inflict upon me, but i will not stoop to that level. petty battles are for little girls. (i choose to believe i'm not petty! well..knocking my weak little knees..and unintentionally causing my shin to hit against something is too small a matter to get mad abt. why waste the little energy i have on that?!) it seems hard to find little joys in my world. maybe i'm not trying hard enough. maybe i need help to see the sunshine. maybe i just need to pick myself up, quit the self pity and thank God for the sunshine, thank Him for the rainbow, thank Him for the few true people i have around me, thank Him for always being there, thank God for Jason. maybe things will be better when i wake up tmr. i don't know now..but if there is a tmr..i must remember to thank God for that too.
